Five Ways to Flirt Online
dan tynan on Feb 12 2008 at 11:34 am | Filed under: Da Web, PC World
Looking for love before Valentine’s Day? You could try one of those complicated, expensive dating sites. Or you could just flirt with random strangers!
(A version of this story originally appeared on PCworld.com and on Washingtonpost.com — only they lopped off my byline, the bastards.)
by Dan Tynan (see, that’s not so hard)
It’s Valentines Day next week, and that can only mean one thing: You’ve still got a few days to get a gift for your loved one(s) or find someone to give a gift to. We can’t help much with the former, but we can assist with the last bit, or at least start you down the right path.
Finding a mate online doesn’t have to entail filling out endless forms, dropping hefty fees at matchmaking services, or navigating the seven circles of social networking hell. It starts with flirting, which you can do cheaply, easily, and at a distance. Better yet: all the rejection happens off line, so you’ll never have to suffer the embarrassment of having your best lines fall flat or finding you’ve got spinach stuck in your teeth.
Here are five of the right places to look for love, or something approximating it.
1. I’m in Like With You
If nothing else, I’m in Like With You is worth visiting just to check out one of the wildest, most innovative Web 2.0 interfaces you’ll ever see. But using it to actually hook up with someone – or even describing how the site works — is a bit tricky. IILWY is essentially a photo-based social network built around an elaborate point system.
You earn points for logging in, posting photos, writing blog entries, and answering random yes/no questions. You spend points by playing auction-style games with other ILLWY members, in which someone posts a question (like “what’s the hardest thing you’ve ever done?”) and you bid for the chance to post a brief response. Each time you respond it costs more points; at the end of the auction, the top bidders may be contacted by the game’s originator, assuming he or she wants to. (Hey, I said it was hard to describe.) Since the odds of connecting are slim, IILWY is really more about flirting – and showing off a truly whizzy interface — than finding true love. But it’s fun to play nonetheless.
2. Crush or Flush
This service is really meant to be used on a cell phone – even the Crush or Flush Web site is designed to look like a handset. The concept is brain-dead simple. You set up a brief profile and upload your picture, then filter other profiles by gender, age, and location. When someone else’s photo shows up on the site or on your phone, you vote whether you have a crush on them or want to flush them. (Hey, nobody said this was going to be rocket science.)
If it turns out that he or she also has a crush on you, the site sends you a text message that lets you connect and start getting busy. Did I mention this is not rocket science? Admittedly, it’s hard to look your best in a postage-stamp-sized picture that was probably taken with a cell phone, so many of the photos look like mugshots (in fact, some of them may actually be mug shots). Be sure to crush with care.
3. Flirting in Traffic
You’re driving on the freeway when you spy your future soul mate in the next lane. Your eyes lock, desperate longing is wordlessly conveyed, but just as you’re signaling the driver to pull over so you can chat, you slam into the rear end of the car in front of you. Flirting in Traffic can take those fleeting moments and turn them into lifelong connections (or just more horrible dating mistakes – see item #5 below).
You set up your free online profile by posting a picture of yourself and your car, along with as many personal details as you care to share. You then print out a PDF of your flirting ID (for example, BN320) or order a $5 sticker and attach it to your car. When you spot another Flirter in Traffic that you want to meet, you can look them up online and send them a note – or vice versa. Will this be your first stop on the highway to happiness or the road to ruin? Your mileage may vary.
4. Hot or Not
Often imitated (see item #2 above) but never truly duplicated, Hot or Not is still one of the most entertaining ways to look for love online. In its simplest guise, the site shows you photos of men or women and lets you rate them on a scale of 1 to 10. (Brave souls can also subject their own pix to the wisdom of the crowd, though it’s not required.) Rate one photo and another one pops up. Before you know it, two hours have disappeared and you’ve missed dinner.
But the flirtation begins when you click the Meet People tab on the home page or the “Click Here to Meet Me” bar above certain photos. As before, you’ll see a pictures of varying hotness; click Yes to meet and No to avoid. If that person clicks Yes when your picture pops up, you can exchange messages via the Hot or Not site. Too random for you? You can winnow your search by gender, age, location, or keyword (like “loves sushi”). Some caveats apply, though. To meet people you must register with the site; to contact someone, one of you has to be a paying member ($6 per month or $60 annually). You’ll also need to check in at least once every two weeks or your account will become inactive. But somehow I doubt that will be a problem.
5. Don’t Date Him Girl
OK, I lied. This is not a site for flirting. This is a site for women who’ve struck by Cupid’s arrow only to discover later it had been dipped in poison. Don’t Date Him Girl began life a few years ago as a forum where scorned women could post entries describing the horrible things the men in their lives had done – complete with photos, locations, and the full names of the allegedly guilty parties. Now it’s blossomed into a love and relationships portal with something for both sexes – advice columns, shopping, e-cards, and video tutorials teaching guys how to avoid being the kind of jerk who ends up listed in the site’s database. At the very least, guys will want to make sure their names aren’t among the 50,000+ found at DDHG — and to show their loved ones that, relatively speaking, things could be a lot worse.
PC World contributing editor Dan Tynan would like to make it clear that, as a happily married man, he no longer requires the use of such services. But he’s happy to consult for a small fee.
